Why, God? As if my life isn’t hard enough. I already struggle to do well in my day-to-day life, but when I’m finally able to get a clear head on my shoulders and approach life with a determination to succeed, then everything has to go wrong in ways far worse than they normally do. I’m sick of this. Continue reading “The Night I Gave Up”
Today, I took a look at myself in the mirror. A very deep look. I took a look and I saw, for the first time in a long time, a little boy. Sure, determined, and immovable, yes, but ignorant, petrified, and brittle. Continue reading “A Look in the Mirror”
Lesson: Preparing for Coming Hardship by Resting in Christ
So, last Sunday I returned to my college apartment, and school starts in three days. I have to say, there are many things that disappoint me about this. I haven’t met any of my personal goals this summer. Continue reading “Still Pleadin’”
Lesson: Being Real Enough to Cry Out to God for Help
I hate San Bernardino. With a passion. I hate it with a purple passion. I don’t even know what that means, but older black people (with Southern roots) used to say it all the time. Whatever it means, that’s how much I hate this city. Continue reading “Problems, Problems, Problems”
Lesson: Acknowledging the Good
We tend to give people this one-sided view of our lives. This image of beautiful satisfaction or immeasurable disdain. Sometimes true, sometimes false, but always an unequal depiction of truth. I’ve noticed myself at times wishing my life was more like someone else’s. Someone who only chooses to capture the highs of their life–the beautiful satisfaction. But I also see that I’ve succumbed to the same trap. Continue reading “Two-Sided Life”
Lesson: Holding On to that Ounce of Faith
Honestly, I hate summer. I know that’s weird. It’s supposed to be the season of freedom—free from mounds of obligation and allotted the time necessary for reprieve in order to start afresh in the fall. But summer has never been that for me. Continue reading “Tainted Trust”
Lesson: Learning to Expressively Care for Those We Overlook
Just yesterday, I posted the following status on Facebook:
When was the last time you sought to find out who someone is before writing them off? You never know how much damage you can do to someone when you simply don’t think about how to actively and expressively love them. What you say is important. What you don’t say is important. How you say it is important. Live life intentionally, and care for everyone. Not just those in your inner circles—everyone.
Lesson: Understanding the Story of Failure
I’m going to be forthcoming for once. For the past two and half years, I’ve ended each day with incredibly deeply rooted regrets. I’ve ended every day upset with myself, wondering why I didn’t do more, why I haven’t performed better, why I just can’t get it right. I’ve loved myself under the premise and with the understanding that God loves me. But I’ve hated myself with immeasurable hate even more. All of my flaws, failures, slipups, pains, weaknesses, emptiness, brokenness. I’ve stretched myself thin.
Continue reading “Beautiful, Unmerited Grace”
Lesson: Unraveling Suppressed Truth in Search for Healing
Well, it’s been a very long time since I’ve written on here. I’ve been very busy. I’m at a great place in life, but there are some things I’d like to share that have been heavy on my heart for some time now. God has been taking me on this journey toward healing, uncovering things that have been buried in my subconscious since I was a kid.
I have to give a disclaimer: this is definitely the modified version of this post. Certain things I had originally written while journaling, I just could not find the strength to include in this post. But here’s what I can say…
Continue reading “The Truth About Freedom”